A bolt of lightning . . .

Destination Time: Wednesday, May 25, 2005

I used to work with this guy who had just started playing poker. He recently discovered Chris Moneymaker and Greg Raymer. Soon enough, he found out I played poker.

It was the worst thing that could happen to me.

He wouldn't stop yapping about his bad beats. It was killing me.

He used to follow me around the office with tales of online suckouts.

There was nowhere I could hide. The lunch room and the coffee room were no longer safe places to go.

There’s always the restroom, right?

Nope.

He’d tell his bad beats stories in there too.

Who talks to people when they’re taking a shit?

I should’ve shut off the restroom lights and ran.

Nightmare.

Torture.

I just couldn't get away.

Avoid the water cooler at all costs.

I was fired from that job a few months later.

Time circuits on.

1.21 gigawatts??

Present Time: Friday, August 31, 2007

There’s a lot of hot chicks at work.

I have a crush on no less than 5 of them.

One them has a hot mother who works with us.

Nice.

Word spread fast this week that the daughter broke up with her boyfriend.

Horny vultures and guys with tight shirts circled the 5 foot 10 leggy 22 yr old blonde.

I went to the bar today after work . . . at 1pm.

Labor Day weekends rule.

A few coworkers were there including the daughter.

Her mother wasn’t there though.

After a few drinks, I popped a serious hard on when the daughter said the magic words to me.

What were those words?

I love poker.

She even said with great confidence, “I play online poker too.”

Sweet.

Which site?

PokerStars.

Mostly play money though.

She was running a home game later at her house.

She still lives with her mom.

Unfortunately, her game was full. Her little brother decided to take the last seat only a few hours ago.

Damn.

She said next time though!

A lot can happen in 2 years. That bad beat guy from work is history. Now I work with a hot 22 year old poker playing vixen. Her sexy single mom plays poker too.

Mainstream is good for poker I say.

They said the wildcard was bad for baseball when it first started. Now everyone loves it.

As the immortal Dudley “Booger” Dawson once said, “Big deal, did you get into her pants?”

She’s not that kind of a girl Booger.

I’ve been out combing the high schools all day.

When you gamble, there’s good beats and there’s bad beats.

Over cards or the pair?

I don’t care.

Pick one and push.

I will leave you with this nice highlight clip of the great Dudley “Booger” Dawson.

Who could forget such memorable lines like . . .

What the fuck are robster craws?

What the fuck’s a frush?

Damn, you Mu’s sure can party.

And remember . . . it’s all about the wonder joints and the Meister Brau beer cans.